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HOW TO CHANGE YOUR NEGATIVE BELIEF SYSTEMS & LIVE A HAPPIER LIFE
Much of the pain and suffering we experience in our lives is a result of old belief systems we have stored away in our unconscious minds. In many ways the unconscious mind is like a library where ideas have been filed like books waiting to be referred to, when an answer, a solution or a response is required.
These belief systems are not always in alignment with our intelligent mind. In fact, if we were able to really look at them clearly and pull them apart, we would think most of them to be ridiculous. This is because most of them were formed before we were five years old and have been kept unaltered for all these years, jumping off the shelves and dictating our actions, thoughts and responses before our intelligent mind even has time to assess the situation.
For example, if you had a parent that often ignored you as a child, you may have concluded that your parent did not like you or that you were unimportant or even unlovable. This information may have been stored away in your unconscious library, ready to be called upon every time anyone ever ignored you or even seemed to be ignoring you, for the rest of your life.
So that when a lover does not answer us straight away, or a friend does not return our text as fast as we want them to, the old belief system can be triggered. Our unconscious mind connects to the old story and we immediately start to feel rejected, unloved or whatever we felt as a little child when our parent was not giving us the attention we needed.
This is not something our intelligent, conscious mind concludes. It is an old belief system that we can often be completely unaware even exists for us. But do we really want a five-year-olds’ ideas to be guiding our lives as adults?
This process for storing belief systems in the reactionary unconscious mind, is a fool proof way of helping us gather important information that will keep us alive. When we are little and our unconscious mind is in that early stage, it is collecting reference material for the future like, don’t cross the road without looking, fire burns, dont run with scissors, etc. These are all good belief systems but the way our lifestyles have evolved means that we have also stored a lot of information that is not necessarily true and often more destructive than helpful.
In the situation above, where we were little children, who have concluded that we are unlovable because our parent ignored us, we have adopted a story that is stored in the library of our unconscious mind. The story says people ignore us (or don’t listen, or don’t spend time with us, or whatever else) because they don’t like us, we are not acceptable, we are not valued, etcetera.
In fact, there could be many reasons our parent appeared to ignore us, that we, as little children had no concept of. Perhaps our parent was suffering from depression and didn’t know how to deal with the demands of a small child. Perhaps they had relationship problems or hated their job. Maybe they had financial problems and were preoccupied with worry. Perhaps they had belief systems of their own to do with spoiling children by giving them too much attention! There could have been hundreds of reasons and only one of those hundreds of possible reasons had anything at all to do with us not being loved, valued, wanted or acceptable.
Still the one we usually choose at that very young, self-centred and inexperienced age, is the one that is all about us. Then it gets locked away in our unconscious library and we use it as the “true story,” the reference point, for the rest of our lives. Until one fine day we realize, that belief system is not helping us or benefiting us at all. We realize that old story is, in fact, hurting us; causing us to suffer, ruining our relationships, making us respond or behave in ways that are not in alignment with the way we want to behave, or feel is the best possible versions of ourselves.
As little children we believed that absolutely everything that ever happened was about us. So the conclusions we drew, as a result of our experiences, that formed our automatic belief systems were mostly about us. We were not capable of formulating belief systems that took everything being our fault or about us, out of the equation. This is why most of our unconscious belief systems (the reference books in our survival library) just don’t serve us very well today. They were all written by a small, inexperienced child who thought everything that ever happened and everything anyone else ever did was all, ultimately because of them.
If you have ever reacted in a way that made you question yourself or that you didn’t like or that made you feel out of control, then you were acting from your unconscious belief system. It is not the way your intelligent, experienced self would choose to act.
If you ever feel sad or depressed, angry or afraid and can’t really come up with a rational reason, it is probably because a story is running in your unconscious library which is causing you to associate with feelings you experienced as a small child.
We don’t always live completely from these old belief systems and most times we are able to stop and think before we respond but when we are stressed, taken by surprised or the situation resembles the old childhood scenario a little too closely, the intelligent thinking mind is bypassed. The unconscious reference library jumps in to save us so fast that it completely avoided the logical thought process and BAM! We find ourselves acting like a child (either throwing a tantrum, sulking, hiding, whining, hitting out, overcome with fear or running away).
As we don’t have a list of all the thousands of belief systems we have stored away, that have been wrongly recorded and that jump out and take us over like some sort of Mr Hyde, it may seem difficult to start getting rid of those ones that do not serve us.
However there is a very simple and effective formula we can use to help us identify and change these old erroneous belief systems and live happier, more positive and less reactive lives.
Hawk Therapies Wellness Centre offers one on one consultations with clients who wish to reprogram negative belief systems in order to flow through life with happiness and abundance. These sessions will enable you to identify where the negative programming originated and effectively reverse it, allowing the positive life flow to take you to where you really need to be.
For more information, contact Hawk Therapies Wellness Centre via our website www.hawktherapies.com.au
Or send an email to firstname.lastname@example.org or call (03) 9331 0737 to book a consultation.
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CD’s and Books available on this topic in store: 35 McFarlane Street, East Keilor VIC 3033
Reprinted with permission from Dr Cunningham